LET US LOVE PEOPLE WHILE THEY ARE ALIVE, NOT ONLY REMEMBER THEM WHEN THEY ARE DEAD

GOSPEL THOUGHTS

*Ordinary Season  : 31st Week:  Monday*

*Gospel :  John 6:37-40*

*First Reading :  Wisdom 3:1-9*

*Responsorial Psalm : 23: 1-6*

*“LET US LOVE PEOPLE WHILE THEY ARE ALIVE, NOT ONLY REMEMBER THEM WHEN THEY ARE DEAD”*

*1) All Souls Day*

All Souls Day is not merely a day to remember those who have died. It is also a day to examine how we treat those who are still alive. We often express our love beautifully at funerals, but do we express the same love when people are living among us?

But today's celebration also challenges us with an important question: Are we loving people enough while they are alive, or are we waiting until they die to express our love? Let us reflect on some practical lessons.

*2) Instead of offering RIP, learn how a person can Rest in Peace while alive.*

We write RIP on photographs, funeral banners, social media posts and messages. We pray that the departed may Rest in Peace.

But have we ever thought about helping people experience a little peace while they are alive?

- Instead of giving someone a sleepless night through our arguments, give them peace.

- Instead of creating tension in the family, create an atmosphere of understanding.

- Instead of troubling someone with unnecessary criticism, offer words of encouragement.

- Instead of becoming the reason for someone's tears, become the reason for their smile.

*Reflection:* Do not wait until someone is dead to wish them peace. Let us become instruments of peace in their lives.

Perhaps the greatest RIP we can give someone is to help them live in peace before they die.

*3) Instead of offering flowers to the coffin, bring some medicine while the person lives.*

At funerals, we spend money on beautiful flowers, wreaths and decorations. We cover the coffin with flowers.

But what about the days when that person was lying in a hospital bed, waiting for someone to bring medicine?

- A flower placed on a coffin cannot bring comfort to the deceased.

- A medicine purchased during illness can relieve someone's suffering.

- A visit to the hospital can give courage to a sick person.

- A helping hand during illness can become an expression of God's love.

*Reflection:* A single strip of medicine given at the right time may be more valuable than a thousand rupees spent on flowers after death. Let us not allow people to suffer alone when we have the ability to help them.

*4) Crying at the deathbed is Natural, But to create some laughter while the person is alive is great Virtue.*

At the death of a loved one, we cry, remember old stories and express how much we miss that person.

But when that person was alive, did we make time to sit with them, talk to them and laugh with them?

- Visit your elderly parents and share a few jokes.

- Spend time with your grandparents and listen to their stories.

- Make your spouse smile after a difficult day.

- Give your children happy memories.

- Make time for friends instead of always saying, "I am busy."

*Reflection:* Do not postpone happiness. The laughter we share today may become our most precious memory tomorrow. A happy memory is a beautiful gift we can leave behind.

*5) Brass band for the funeral is ok, But speaking a few loving words while the person lives is more important.*

At funerals, we sometimes arrange grand brass bands, elaborate processions and beautiful ceremonies.

But while the person was alive, did we ever tell them:

- "Thank you for everything you have done for me."

- "I love you."

- "I am proud of you."

- "You are important in my life."

- "I am sorry for hurting you."

- "I appreciate your sacrifices."

Sometimes a person waits for years to hear just one word of appreciation.

*Reflection:* A few loving words spoken during life are more meaningful than a thousand words spoken over a coffin.Do not allow your love to remain unexpressed.

*6) Instead of making a grand celebration after death, spend quality time with the person while alive.*

When someone dies, relatives and friends come from distant places. People gather, spend time together and share memories.

But when that person was alive, how often did we visit?

- We say we have no time to visit our parents, but we find time to attend their funerals.

- We are too busy to visit an elderly relative, but we make time to attend the funeral.

- We postpone family gatherings, but after death everyone comes together.

*Reflection:* The best gift we can give someone is our presence.

Sometimes people do not need our money, gifts or expensive presents. They simply need us to sit beside them. Do not wait for a funeral to reunite a family.

*7) Instead of spending enormous amounts on funeral ceremonies, help the person with medical expenses while alive.*

Some families spend large amounts on funeral arrangements, food, decorations, graves, flowers and other ceremonies.

There is nothing wrong with honouring the dead with dignity. Funeral rites are important expressions of love, faith and respect.

However, we must also ask ourselves:

- Could we have used some of that money to purchase medicines?

- Could we have helped with hospital bills?

- Could we have provided better care during the person's illness?

- Could we have made their final days more comfortable?

*Reflection:* Let us spend more on relieving human suffering than on displaying our wealth after death. The greatest honour we can give a person is to care for them when they need us most.

*8) Instead of speaking good about a person Only during the eulogy, speak good while the person lives.*

At funerals, we hear beautiful words:

"He was a wonderful person."

"She was a loving mother."

"He was very generous."

"She sacrificed everything for her family."

But did we tell them these things when they were alive?

Sometimes we fail to appreciate people when they are with us. We recognise their goodness only when they are gone.

- Appreciate your mother's sacrifices today.

- Recognise your father's hard work today.

- Thank your teachers while they are alive.

- Appreciate your spouse's contributions.

- Encourage your children when they do something good.

*Reflection:* Appreciation delayed until death is appreciation that can no longer be personally received.

Let us not make people famous only in their obituary. Make them feel valuable during their lifetime.

*9) Lighting candles at the grave, and becoming a light in someone's life.*

On All Souls Day, we light candles at the graves of our departed loved ones. The candle symbolises Christ, the Light of the World, and our hope in the resurrection.

But while people are alive, are we becoming a light in their lives?

- Give hope to someone who is discouraged.

- Give courage to someone who is afraid.

- Give guidance to someone who is confused.

- Give companionship to someone who is lonely.

- Give forgiveness to someone who has made a mistake.

*Reflection:* It is beautiful to light a candle at someone's grave. But it is even more beautiful to remove the darkness from someone's life while they are alive.

*10) Instead of asking, "Who will come to my funeral?", ask, "Who needs me today?"*

Some people are very concerned about how many people will attend their funeral.

They want a grand funeral, a large gathering and a lot of people to speak about them.

But the more important question is:

How many people are experiencing God's love through me today?

- How many people have I helped?

- How many people have I forgiven?

- How many people have I encouraged?

- How many lonely people have I visited?

- How many people have experienced kindness through me?

*Reflection:* The greatness of our life is not measured by the number of people who attend our funeral, but by the number of lives we have touched while living.

*11) Instead of regretting what we did not do after death, do what we can today.*

After someone dies, we often hear these words:

"If only I had visited him!"

"If only I had spoken to her!"

"If only I had forgiven him!"

"If only I had spent more time with my parents!"

"If only I had helped when they needed me!"

These words express the pain of opportunities that have passed.

But life gives us opportunities today.

- If you have a quarrel with someone, reconcile.

- If you have hurt someone, apologise.

- If someone needs help, extend your hand.

- If someone is waiting for your call, make that call.

- If someone is longing for your presence, visit them.

*Reflection:* Do not allow today's opportunities to become tomorrow's regrets.

Yesterday is gone. Tomorrow is uncertain. Today is the opportunity God has given us.

*12) Instead of remembering only the death anniversary, celebrate the person's birthday while alive.*

We remember death anniversaries with prayers, Masses and visits to the cemetery. These are meaningful acts of remembrance.

But how many times do we make the effort to celebrate the birthday of an elderly parent, a lonely relative or a sick person?

A birthday celebration need not be expensive.

- A simple cake.

- A family gathering.

- A phone call.

- A loving greeting.

- A visit and a prayer.

These little gestures communicate a powerful message: "You are precious to us."

*Reflection:* Do not celebrate only the day someone left this world. Celebrate the gift of their presence while they are still with us.

*13) Carrying the coffin on our shoulders, and carrying one another's burdens during life.*

At a funeral, people come together to carry the coffin. They walk behind the deceased as a final gesture of respect.

But St Paul tells us: "Bear one another's burdens, and so fulfil the law of Christ." (Galatians 6:2)

Why should we wait until death to carry someone?

- Carry the burden of a struggling family.

- Support a person facing financial difficulties.

- Stand beside someone going through depression or loneliness.

- Help an elderly person who cannot manage alone.

- Support someone who is going through a family crisis.

*Reflection:* It is good to carry the coffin of a departed person. But it is more Christian to carry the burdens of a living person.

*14) Love people while they are alive!*

1. Don't decorate the coffin with flowers; decorate someone's life with love.

2. Don't wait for a funeral to speak good about someone; appreciate them today.

3. Don't wait for the deathbed to shed tears; share laughter during life.

4. Don't wait for the funeral to gather the family; spend time together today.

5. Don't wait for death to say, "You were precious to me"; tell someone today, "You are precious to me."

"The greatest tribute to the dead is not what we do at their grave, but what we learn from their life and practise in our own lives."

*Think about it*

*God bless you and your family. Praying for you and your dear ones*

*Fr Maxim DSouza*

*Jeppu Seminary*

*Mangalore*